the couple conversation.

what it means to be a couple?

to have another person to share happiness and sadness? to have another person waiting for you with an open arm? to have another person to hear your stories and share theirs to you? 

or.....

to have hurt because of the proximity that they have? to have lie easily because we know their activity 24/7? to gain their trust? to control your life?

yes God had already made us in pair, but what it means really? why we created and born as individuals to have just be paired one day with another individuals? for whom or for what we learned about being strong on our feet and then we just throw reliance to other people? what is it for then? what's the use anyway?

another one bites the dust.

i realized that i never have a happy thought in my life. it was full of anxiousness and it led me to having a horrible personality. (or personalities?)

i know i shot a numerous of pictures, uploaded it on social media, collecting quotes for the caption, reshare a quote that i thought it was well said or matched with recents, but i knew more than anyone that obviously hated words. ironically, i fond of writing and reading. but you know, i love words that for myself that helped me found my own freedom -- while in fact, the words said by other people not. they imprisoned me in an endless worry, fear, disbelief, and sadness. many thoughts that words were powerful for me so they gave me a motivational speech, a gorgeous quotes, but hell none of it worked for me. words are just words. only for reading only for re-writing. just how much people can just believe in anything that only came in form of words?